from Yahoo News:

Yep, a new store : A bulldog, mascot of British men’s fashion house Alfred Dunhill is displayed in front of newly opened flagship shop at Tokyo’s Ginza fashion district. (AFP/Yoshikazu Tsuno)

And the future of our country displays it’s junior high mind and is promptly…arrested. Yahoo News reports,

MISSOULA, Mont. – A college student accused of shoving a pumpkin pie into the face of a shopping-mall Santa Claus has been charged with misdemeanor assault.

Clint Westwood, 22, (someone’s parents were thinking on their feet 22 years ago! -ed) said he “lightly smooshed” the pie into the man’s face Wednesday and shouted, “What do you think of that, Santa?”

Westwood, a drama student at the University of Montana, was charged Friday. He said he videotaped the encounter and plans to include the clip in an upcoming film.

He said that after the pie ruckus, he expected to approach Santa for a signature on a film-release form, but police arrived first.

“It’s a good thing he didn’t wait around, because I think Santa would have laid him out,” said Sgt. Travis Welsh of the Missoula Police Department.

Westwood said he and companions had waited for a girl about 15 years old to finish sitting on Santa’s lap before the pie hit his face, “but then we just decided it would be funnier if she was still sitting there.”

Waaay back when I had this thing called “Combating Monday” and it was an effort to destroy the ugly of the day known as Mon. Every Monday I posted something funny to keep that smile plastered on my face through the day that nobody likes. The feature stopped and since then my (non) Zoloft habit has been out of control. Seriously, the neighbors are starting to talk.

In an effort to save me money and stares I’ve decided to bring it back along with the “TGIF!” which was the same thing except for Fridays to celebrate the start of the weekend.

A helping of LOLCATS to get you through to Monday is below.

moar funny pictures

To get through Monday…via Dragonlady:

from my inbox

When our lawn mower broke and wouldn’t run, my wife kept hinting to me that I should get it fixed But, somehow I always had something else to take care of first, the truck, the car, playing golf, sleeping in the blue chair – always something more important to me.

Finally she thought of a clever way to make her point. When I arrived home one day, I found her seated in the tall grass, busily snipping away with a tiny pair of sewing scissors. I watched silently for a short time and then went into the house. I was gone only a minute, and when I came out again I handed her a toothbrush.

I said, “When you finish cutting the grass, you might as well sweep the driveway.”

The doctors say I will walk again, but I will always have a limp.

Moral to this story:

Marriage is a relationship in which one person is always right, and the other is the husband.

Language warning…but it’s funny as all get out. You were warned. Get through Monday with Pearl…

Two fold. Mothers day and your combat monday post in one!

My relationship with Monday is fraught with pain and anger.  Which is why I attempt to combat Monday at the start of the week with a funny story or picture to push past the Monday Blues.

The story below should help.

From Yahoo News: Oddly Enough.

STEVENS POINT, Wis. – A Stevens Point man thought he was lucky to recover his car after it was stolen — until it was stolen again later that day.

York Heiden’s pearl-colored 1990 Audi Quattro was stolen from a grocery store parking lot April 27 while his wife was running errands. The keys had been left in it.

Heiden, 36, who owns an automotive repair shop, quickly called some friends and the car was found nearby, without keys.

He said he had a friend disable the car’s ignition by removing a coil wire while he left it to pick up a spare key. When he returned, the car was gone. He had forgotten, he said, that the model Audi had a two-coil system and could be driven with just one.

“I was speechless,” Heiden said, recalling how he stood where the car had been found, keys dangling from his fingers, the emotional high of finding the car dashed. “All I could do was hold the key up in my hand and look at it.”

“Everyone says, ‘You shouldn’t have left it,’” Heiden said, laughing. “But I know, I know … So many what-ifs: I shouldn’t have done this, I should have taken the tire off.”

Police later found the car in the same neighborhood. It had a broken taillight and a broken piece of interior trim.

What did Heiden learn from his ordeal?

“Don’t leave your keys in the ignition,” he said. “And if you find it, do not leave it.”

Another week, another dollar and pile of bills.

From DragonLady.  Edited for content.  See the hilarity below.

1. If you’ve known a guy for more than 24 hours, his sister is off limits forever! Unless you actually marry her.

2. When questioned by a friend’s girlfriend, you need not and should not provide any information as to his whereabouts. You are even permitted to deny his very existence.

3. Unless he murdered someone in your immediate family, you must bail a friend out of jail within 24 hours.

Read the full article »

The day we all hate. Monday. Evvvil day. I’ve decided to hunker down today and avoid Monday at all costs. You can see my photo below in my ultra secret storehouse forty feet underground. So I have a thing for bananas…

King of the castle : A white-handed gibbon eats a banana while sitting on a giant fruit display at the Everland amusement and animal park in Yongin, south of Seoul, during the opening of an anthropoid theme park called “Friendly Monkey Valley.”(AFP/Jung Yeon-Je)

And of course, cats always help soothe the Monday ick.

Tastes good : A cat licks its nose during a cat exhibition in Sofia.(AFP/Boryana Katsarova)

For those wondering if lawsuits in prison…here’s the latest from my great state:

DENVER – Three prisoners serving potential life sentences in Colorado say their lives have been threatened — by mosquitoes.  The inmates at Walsenburg and Limon prisons sued, saying they were at risk of contacting

West Nile virus or other diseases after they were bitten repeatedly by mosquitoes and suffered “the emotional and mental distress of whether or not each mosquito’s bite would result in death or serious bodily injury.”

Stephen G. Glover, Alan Smith and Michael Freeman said the bites caused high fever, headache, neck stiffness and muscle weakness. “Each attack constituted bodily injury, which the (Department of Corrections) had the power to prevent, but consciously elected not to,” wrote the inmates, acting as their own attorneys.

But the Colorado Court of Appeals swat down their case and upheld a lower court’s decision to throw their case out. Prison officials said no confirmed cases of West Nile virus have ever been found in the prison population, and inmates are provided mosquito repellant.

A few things to help you get through this ugly day.

This is how I felt this morning: Via Cuteoverload:

Ever see spiders on drugs? Ever seen it…like this?